Twentieth

This year's 20th Birthday celebration is sure different -

First was the planned-out surprise my clique gave which I was totally unaware of. I enjoyed the evening because friends were there. Dinner was great too. Thousand thanks for showing up and your presents! I'll use them well.

Had lunch with my family today to celebrate in advance since all will be busy next week. Dad got me my Aino and a miracle hard disk. Yes!! And I chose a Mocha cake. Hahaha.

Went to library afterward to check out a new author - Kathryn Fox. Wonder if her series is nice. Hopefully it'll be. If so then maybe I'll pause my Prison Break and pick up reading again.

Extended family chalet is coming! I'll bathe myself in medical oil to ward off all evil mosquitoes and spice them to death before they poke their nose on me.

Shoo.

Together

One new story; one new heartbeat.

Words

No doubt the pay is good, but they don’t seem to understand – Money isn’t everything.

Was it because they knew they could easily psycho me with their words or things they offer that'll make me feel guilty if I just turn my back and walk away?

Your sweet words ..

I don't even know what I'm doing back there again. It should stop here. Don’t take people for granted. Sometimes it’ll be good if you could pause and think. Not everything has to go your way. We're your staff, think of our welfare once in a while. Don't you realize that everyone is fleeing? Perhaps we're all lucky that you got too busy, there isn't even a contract we need to break.

And, the way you twist your words are kind of scary.

Everyone knows your talent.

Perhaps

There's a possibility, there's always a possibility.

Just how big?

Character

 

There's no way we can understand everything that happens because if we do, there won't be any mysteries left to solve.

People's mind, people's heart, their actions and behaviors. Ask yourself why, but the only thing that seems logical is - the way we are brought up contributes to the way we behave.

Unwelcomed reignition

Our thread was broken; individual foot paths continued in its solemn emptiness.

There was no response, and there was no longer an effort or need to try make things work.

Your shadow is tied to the back of my head, yet with silhouette that appears ever so prominently at the tip of my eyes.

A war between pride and want, a battle with the heart and mind, a struggle that is not meant to be.

 

Don't appear.

It's a mind game.

Mood lift

Started youtubing more on Taylor Swift's songs because I heard one of hers in my playlist and it's really nice. Realized that she has a lot more songs written which I didn't know about, as always. Hur.

Went out with Bestie finally! After so long. Tonnes of misses. Have been friends for 16 years now. WOW. I miss my school days, filled with memories of all kinds, precious. Really happy that there are friendships which lasts; strong, firm friendships despite our busy schedules and lack of time to meet.

Friends are my gems on earth.

Will be meeting my precious clique tomorrow for picnic too, really looking forward to it.

It's girls' time!

This

Weird Monday.

Things went smoothly at work so far, considering the fact that I managed to cross the huge rocks that fell onto my path since the first hours of this day.

Ironically, despite the few hours of sleep I've had last night, I'm amazingly more perked up today compared to yesterday where I get to enjoy a full clock of sleep totalling up to 8+ hours.

Oh well. That's good news I guess. Will be forgoing some hours again today; tomorrow will be a bonus.

Anticipation

Looking forward to things isnt always good - it depends on what you are looking forward to. In my case, waiting for September 30th to come is honestly a torture.

You have no idea how badly I want that day to come, yet as I count down each day, I ended up ruining the joy of living in the hours of this month. And I grew even more tired and restless, or at least, that was what I've managed to figure out - the cause of my fatigue.

It's not physical; it's mental.

September

This shall officially be my last month in Dragonfly.Have been waiting for this day but at least completing 6 months here looks better on resume.

The next will be better.

Was that a goodbye?

Mister, you have proved your significance, you have left your mark in me. 

Your presence is felt in all places my foot has stepped, and amongst all activities of my hands. I remember the hours with which we clung on to, the aftertaste that could not be removed. 

Holding on with a hint of reluctance, moving on with a tittle of unpleasantness. 

There was no signs of communication. 

Your presence still lingers.

Unspoken

There's a limit to how much a person can accept another's selfishness,but there's not much you can complain because we are  all the same.

And though you feel that the way you treat others are good,

there are times where you play the role of a baddie too.

So understanding that point,

you flare and show your unhappiness,

for you are angry not just because you were treated this way, but that there are times where you act the same way as this baddie does.

Peace

Woke up early in the morning at 6.45am on a finally-non-working-Sunday.

My body is already like an auto alarm clock.

Got up and read a book on Brains I've borrowed. Interesting Bio stuff.

Then .. out to market with Mum and yoohoo went to get a haircut though it turned out pretty bad - it's the fringe's doing. But it's only $5. Hmm. At least my head feels a little lighter now. Had fun walking in a market though it's honestly a wrong place to begin with.

Mood did become better anyway - have been feeling grumpy and moodless.

It's mother's love.

Conscience

Humans - a very smart and unpredictable breed.

We won't know what they're thinking; how creative cells in their brains work till one day, they sit you down and tell you a twisted logic they've churned out that is ironically, struggling so desperately to cover that tiny deception they bring you while looking into your eyes saying - I'm a good man.

Stranded

Not enjoying anymore, but keep on walking.
If I put my left foot in front of my right,
and then my right in front of my left,
the ending place they bring me to may be a consolation prize.

Alert! Fart is toxic

Nevermind if I got home late from work and reported early the next day because I couldn't think of anything worse to complain. Who knows? 

Sometimes when you think you're caught in the worse situation, think twice.

Is it my luck or those people think I needed an energy boost to perk me up in morning? I cant believe I have to breathe in fart in a humid, crampy train.

Depriving me of sleep doesnt seem to be enough, they have to take my oxygen away too.

Well done!

Priority

honestly, I would never want to exchange my rest for money.

Console

Shoot for the moon,

even if you missed it,

you'll land among the stars

Leashed

Came home late for consecutive 3 to 4 days because I met up with friends after work.

Today, I reached back home at 1am. Obviously, mum and dad aren’t that pleased.

Sometimes when you feel that you’ve grown old enough to take care of yourself, your parents still think otherwise. True, parents are parents. But sometimes, a little more freedom would be nice.

"Because you're a girl, so you dont have the license to come home late"

My once upon a time with you

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

180 degrees

Today is my first day of work at Dragonfly.

Good start, because the bosses are abroad so there isn't any stress learning the ropes of the job. Plus, the environment is so peacefully calm and relaxed since there was only Marcella and I. I have to activate my brain power system and absorb as much as I can because this is Marcella's last week.

Unfortunately the day ended off badly with some complications that surfaced. Inner thought speaks. 
No matter how long you drag, how much you think, things won't change.

Set foot

7 days Taiwan trip was fun, though there were little hiccups somewhere. Still, stepping foot into a country so foreign and conquering it with your friends makes it all worthwhile.

And those little clashes, piece up memories too. Together with the talks, the fun and laughters, those oh-so-stupid poses and monkey faces .. 

Talks we had, I must say, are good talks. Talks that shares the deepest secrets hiddened within oneself, secrets that arent visible and buried deep inside.

and i say

The world is a beautiful place,

Friendship is a beautiful thing.

Unconditional

I like talking to friends because it brings us closer.
And sometimes in the talks, you'll discover a pure and genuine character which you never knew existed.

I'm happy with the friends I have around me. They are truly those whom I know I can trust and rely on, whose shoulders always there for me to lean on. 

That when I turn back, their faces will be there.

Understood

Everything falls back into place.

An unfinished story without any words to fill.

Still, it's a new start.

At least there's a closure to things, though unofficial.

It's a tiny light

Pure silence

I can see a fullstop because nothing has changed.

Meanwhile, my holidays had been fun so far, especially with my busy and hectic schedules everyday. It's exhausting, but crazily exciting!

It doesn't matter anymore.

Give me a sign

Wordless,

because there’s nothing much left for me to say.
Tired,

because trying doesn’t help.

Confused,

because I don’t know what’s going on anymore.

And so, do I leave things as it is?

Stagnant

Perhaps I should've pushed forward and tried harder. But sometimes experience tells you not to because you know how things will end up when you approach a certain topic.

Yet it remains a struggle because you don't know how you should solve it, which apparently ended up not getting solved at all.