The once enigmatic grace had too, been conquered by footsteps of reality No spoils to glean from nor beauty in the ruins My song, where have you dissipated to?
Sit me down and paint me a night sky
Show your magnificence, splash the glitters Bloom again
Who am I, that I should be the bearer of someone else's tears?
Where in such rare occasions, a shadow absorbed more darkness than light casted in its dwelling; where compared to burns at the face of heat, scars were etched on ground.
A glass carrying a full brim of sweetness and warmth had to break at my first sip. Three days of eyebags filled with dejection and self-induced stress tide over had to welcome back an unappreciated fourth of its kind. Afraid of what the dawn brings, A joy stolen by the midnight thief, I found my dried tears replenishing its flow in the middle of the night.
When I have plenty of spare time in hand, I sat and rot. When it's time to study, I spring clean, I reorganize my blog, I watch drama series and spam movies. Just anything but burying my head in books. Awaiting: 22 May 2015 - the day of freedom.
4 years of warmth and security; 4 years of learning experience; 4 years of humbling tests. But these are also 4 years of fatigue, 4 years of enduring trials, and 4 years of gravel with accumulated worth, sufficient to have now triggered me to rethink and weigh it's value.
Decision making never comes easy; what follows is also unpredictable. Now caught in between a yesand a no, a tormenting thought process that further depletes my remaining strength.
We will never know - which decision is the right one. But I will take a step of faith, follow my inner thought, the first sting of determination.
Sometimes the only way to discover God's will is to practice what I call "stepping out and finding out." If you have prayed about a situation and don't seem to know what you should do, take a step of faith. Don't be afraid of making a mistake. Step out and God will guide you.